Will.i.am Vs. Perez Hilton

I’m obsessed with the new Black Eyed Peas Album. I have no idea why. I shouldn’t be. “They just aren’t my genre”, but something about their fresh summer sounds make me feel like I’m at a constant party. There’s a song called ‘One Tribe’ that is my current favorite.

“One Tribe, One Time, One Planet, One Race
It’s all one blood, don’t care about your face
The color of your eye
Or the tone of your skin
Don’t care where you are
Don’t care where you been
….
Cuz man, I’m loving this peace
Man, man I’m loving this peace
Man, man I’m loving this peace
…
One tribe, ya’ll
One tribe, ya’ll
One tribe, ya’ll
We are one people
Let’s cast amnesia, forget about all that evil
Forget about all that evil, that evil that they feed ya
Remember that we’re one people”

I’m 32 and jaded. Hilariously bitter. I honestly try to find the good in everything, even though everything isn’t good. I would be a lot happier if I didn’t believe in happiness. So, when a song catches the spirit of forgiveness and positivity and wraps it up in a dance party – I get excited. It makes me feel like the unattainable is attainable. Will. i. am., the man behind this song, just dampened my summer party. Perez Hilton called him a ‘faggot’ and someone in Will’s posse punched him. Even if it wasn’t Will.i.am. himself, he obviously condones the physicality.

Sure, Perez Hilton is a slug. I don’t love his schtick, even though the American culture created him. He should take a lesson from this beating and eat some humble cake soup. He definitely should not be able to use the word ‘faggot’ at anyone. It is intolerable, and for someone who seeks tolerance for equal civil rights, Perez comes off Superlametown, USA.

Here is my open note to Will.i.am…

Dear Will.i.am.,

I’ll be honest. I’m actually on Perez’s side on this, which I feel is the minority. Verbal violence does not equate physical violence – under any circumstances. End of story. Will, you should take a listen to your own song and learn a lesson yourself. I hate it when I feel like I wanna be positive and then, suddenly, I’m reminded of why the world will never be one, big, dance party. Just makes me sad. Thanks a lot, Will.i.am., for not believing in your own artistic creation. How can I believe, if you can’t back it up?

I guess you “just aren’t my genre”.
I guess you’re just Will.i.was.

Protesting Protests

I stood behind the police barrier as the people walked past me. Hundreds became thousands. There was about 50 of us penned in the fences, but there was a countless mob of ethnic Christians all around. Their brown faces twisted with hate and disgust. They were armed with megaphones and Biblias. Most of their ramblings were in a foreign language, but it was clearly translated into one word – “homophobia”.

Why was I inspired to go to this anti-gay marriage protest that was sponsored by Radio Vision Cristiana International and the Hispanic Clergy Organization? Because I wanted the haters to put faces to the people they are discriminating against. You can’t bring bus-loads full of people, who speak English as a second language, into the gay island of Manhattan to protest without hearing from us. I wanted to represent.

Since we were dealing with very religious activists, I wanted to bring a symbol with me that they would recognize. I brought a bright, yellow crucifix with a wooden heart attached to the middle, where Jesus usually hangs. It was given to me by a developmentally disabled student of mine years ago. To me, it means unconditional love. It means that everyone is equal in the eyes of love, no matter your religious beliefs. I stood silently, with my cross at my chest, and made sure to look everyone in the eye as they went past. The site of a faggot holding a cross drove them insane.

“God bless you”, said one lady without looking me in the eye.

“God bless you”, said an old man as he walked by with his eyes closed.

“It’s not about hate, it’s about love. Jesus LOVES you.” An angry teenager told us this, but her tone was full of anger. I thought perhaps it was due to her age, then a lady in her 40’s walked past and sneered, “God bless you”.  This happened too many times to count. The looks of confusion on the children’s faces was heartbreaking.

As the parade of hostile churchgoers continued, I noticed that the script they were saying said, “Jesus loves you” or “God bless you”, but the subtext in their hearts was “Fuck you fag” or “You’re sick, jerk”. What they were saying clearly did not match what they were feeling. Every time a Bible was shoved in my face, I couldn’t help but hear the real Jesus say, “Please don’t do that. Please don’t use my name in hate.” I can’t think of anything more sick than the sanctimonious actions of every mother who walked by carrying their daughter in their arms or pushing their son in a stroller while using Jesus as a tool of hate. Completely disgusting people.

Whenever minorities speak out against gay marriage, it really pushes my “fuck off” button. They know similar struggles, they are supposed to “get it”. Homophobia runs deep in religion and misunderstanding. It’s clear that blacks, or latinos in this case, are born “that way”, but gay people have to prove over and over again, that we are based in genetics too. Until everyone understands that, nothing will truly change.

On the upside, I got to meet Lt. Dan Choi (click his name to see his video on The Rachel Maddow Show), who was part of the under-attended counterprotest. He has become the current face of the ‘Don’t Ask Don’t Tell’ policy. He is also originally from Orange County, Ca. and he told me about how his dad refuses to talk to him since he came out of the closet. We chatted for about 5 minutes. He is such a great guy.

After an hour of barfable latinos yelling at me, I went to get drunk on sangria at brunch with a bunch of gays. I have made a slide show full of the gross people I encountered while at the protest. Enjoy!

The Prop 8 protest in NYC was super cruisey

Protesting Prop 8 is the new way to pick up guys. That’s what last night’s Prop 8 protest at the Mormon temple told me. Everyone made colorful signs and dressed in winter scarves with matching caps to meet outside in the cold air. As the group of an estimated 10,000 supporters of gay marriage marched down Broadway, passed Lincoln Center, and ended up in Columbus Circle we all huddled together tightly for warmth… and to touch butts on “accident”. We all chanted silly things that rhymed while everyone checked each other out. If you can’t flirt AND stand up for equal rights at the same time, then what kind of gay are you?

The organizers of the event told everyone online what type of signs to make. They warned to stay away from the polygamy argument, the warned to stay away from attacking religion, they warned to keep the message positive in order to unite and “take the higher road”. Originally, I was gonna make a sign that was very Latter Day Saints specific – “L.ITTLE D.UMB S.HITS” So, in an ironic twist on words in the Bible and the Book of Mormon, I made a double sided sign quietly mocking religious opponents of gay marriage.

For those religiously unaware, “Jesus wept” is the shortest verse in The Bible. I think Jesus would weep about the current state that this civil rights cause has reached. Plus, I always like using The Bible against Biblebeaters. Lord knows, I have a ton of knowledge on the subject since I went to Christian and Catholic Schools for most of my life. Clinging to stories from the past and not bothering to think for yourself certainly seems strange to me. Not nearly as strange as The Book of Mormon who was written by the “prophet” Joseph Smith. This guy took some shrooms and tripped out in a forest and wrote down everything that Jesus “told him”. The phrase “And it came to pass…” starts thousands of “verses” from the Book of Mormon (“And it came to pass this“ “And it came to pass that”), so naturally, I wanted to take a jab at them while trumpeting the message of gay marriage.

After we gathered at the entrance to Central Park, everyone sort of stood around and check out each other’s signs. I wish someone was there to give out prizes for best signs. I think I could have been a serious contender. My favorite was either the black lesbian that said “Should we sit on the back of the bus too?” or one young, hot gay that said “I didn’t ask him to “civil union” me!” We had brought noise makers to shake while we marched in the streets so we stood around and shook them.

My gaggle of gays and I got hungry, so we walked down 9th Avenue, the gayest street in Gayville, and ate at Vinyl, the gayest restaurant in Gayville. I didn’t want my sign anymore, so I discarded it on a pile of cardboard underneath an Ipod Nano ad. GAY! I would’ve felt bad for leaving it there, but the protest was a little underwhelming in energy. It’s great that there were 10,000 people there, and I LOVE IT, but I couldn’t help but think that there is much more passion in California over this right now.

On the way to the train, we stumbled on a liquor store that still had a Hillary for President sign in the window. Wow. How steadfast.

I’m going to go look at the Missed Connections on Craigslist now to see if anyone from the protest wants to hook up with me.

Oh and here’s one last shot that I love from the protest. It’s a keeper!

Prop 8 Donations Are Public Record!!!

Today, I stumbled upon a website that lists the donors of both sides of the Prop 8 campaign. I hope these people google their name someday and find my blog.

BAD GUY LIST

Brett Stohlton of Newport Beach, CA donated $2,000 in support of Yes on Prop 8. Brett is a dork.

Steve Keithly of La Mirada, CA donated $3,000. He works at Whittier Mailing Products and fucks cows.

La Dorna Eichenberg of Newport Beach, CA donated $10,000. She works for Ellison Educational and she eats her own poop.

Alan Anderson of Laguna Beach, CA donated $30,000 to take gay’s rights away. He is employed by South Coast Healthcare Management and kills babies.

Robert Hurtt Jr. of Garden Grove, CA gave $250,000 to give to a campaign that singled out one type of person and took their rights away. Robert Hurrt Jr. cannot get an erection.

GOOD GUYS

Jeff Cook is a student at Cal State Fullerton. He was able to give $100 dollars to No on Prop 8.

Kevin Rowe is a student at UC Berkeley and he gave $100 in support of gay marriage.

Gordon Babst goes to Chapman University. He was able to spare $100 to support equal rights.

Something is seriously wrong with this picture. Why is it that people who have more money get to say what’s right. Why do they have a louder voice? For every stupidface like Robert Hurrt Jr., you have to find 2,500 poor students who are willing to donate for equality. It makes me very, very sad.

“You never call anymore…”

You know what’s awesome?

Finding out a family member is pro-McCain.

You know what’s really awesome?

Finding out a family member is against gay marriage.

You know what’s the most awesomest thing EVER?

Knowing that he doesn’t even bother registering to vote in the first place.

Lametown.

This bitch started a fight with me on Facebook…

So, I was reading through a Michael Phelps Fans message board the other day, and along came Jessica Berry. She is a graduate of Jacksonville Christian Academy and, apparently, a really big fan of the Olympics. On the message board, some hilarious little gay boy started the important thread topic of “Any Dudes Wanna Hump Michael Phelps?” Well, Jessica just couldn’t stay on topic. She told all the boys in the thread that they were going to hell and that they were morally bankrupt and that God made Adam & Eve, not Adam & Steve. So unoriginal. Those Christian assholes need a new line.

I told her to shut up and go listen to her Hannah Montana CDs.

From there, she took her Christian values up a notch and told me that being gay is a choice and that since I chose sin, I would be damned in eternal damnation or something. We all know how that topic gets under my skin, so I said something mean about her caked on make-up. After several nasty messages back and forth, I got tired and stopped yelling at her. Christian girls are boring…. but not boring enough to list some quotes from their Facebook messages!

“being gay doesnt just happen u decide how u want to be and u chose to be gay and dont get mad at me get mad at God cause im just only saying what he said”

“being homo is not an ethnic race”

“Hannah Montana isn’t my style. I’m more of a Jonas Brothers gurl”

“have a peachy keen day. jesus loves u “

“now about the makeup ur just jealous cause u cant wear it”

She obviously doesn’t have any gay friends. Otherwise she would KNOW that we CAN wear make-up.

What a sad example of America. What a disgusting, mindless human being. What a cunt.

Kanye Sucks

I am obsessed with the recent Kanye fallout. His performance at Bonnaroo was a steamy piece of cat shit. After reading a bunch of blogs from the people who were there, I have solidified a decently accurate account of what happened.

After insisting he go on after Pearl Jam, Kanye delayed his glow-in-the-dark show until 4:30am. Sure, Pearl Jam played an hour over their time limit, but word on the street is that Bonnaroo organizers asked them to play longer because Kanye wasn’t ready to load his ginormous spaceship onto the set. Kanye still burned up 1 hour and 45 minutes for setting up his lame lights and pyro and then had to race against the sunrise to perform his entire set. He neither greeted the crowd or said thank you afterwards. He just left the stage without even a single ‘Hello’. What a fucknut.

Some say Kanye didn’t like his time slot at the second stage and considered himself a main stage act and made organizers bump his slot. Others say he was coming from a show in Atlanta and was delayed because he was traveling to Bonnaroo. By the time Kanye took the stage, the crowd was so tired and irritated, they started chanting “Kanye Sucks” and throwing glow sticks and beer bottles on the stage!! Basically, Kanye is a whiny, punk bitch and I love, love, LOVE how this is getting under his skin. He even posted a rant on his own blog to try to do some damage control, but in the process only makes himself look like a tool. Here is the text from his blog post (I have highlighted my favorite quotes)…

________________________________________________________________________________________________

“I am sick of negative people who just sit around trying 2 plot my downfall… Why???? I understand if people don’t like me because I like me or if people think tight clothes look gay or people say I run my mouth to much, But this Bonnaroo thing is the worst insult I’ve ever had in my life. This is the most offended I’ve ever been… this is the maddest I ever will be. I’m typing so fucking hard I might break my fucking Mac book Air!!!!!!!! Call me any name you want…. arrogant, conceited, narcissistic, racist, metro, fag whatever you can think of…. BUT NEVER SAY I DIDN’T GIVE MY ALL! NEVER SAY I DIDN’T GIVE MY ALL! THIS SHOWS NO MATTER HOW HARD YOU TRY TO BE GOOD AT SOMETHING THERE WILL BE PEOPLE THERE TO LIE ABOUT YOU AND BRING YOU DOWN! LIKE WAYNE SAYS PLEASE DON’T SHOOT ME DOWN CAUSE I’M FLYING! I’M FUCKING HURT BY THIS ONE. ALL I CARE ABOUT ARE THE FANS. JUST SAY THIS OUT LOUD IN A ROOM FULL OF PEOPLE, “KANYE DOESN’T CARE ABOUT GIVING A GOOD PERFORMANCE.” CAN ANYONE HONESTLY SAY THAT ????????? HAS ANYONE EVEN TAKEN THE TIME TO AT LEAST DO THE MATH??? BONNAROO SHOULD HAVE RELEASED A STATEMENT IN MY DEFENSE BUT SINCE THEY HAVEN’T LET’S BREAK DOWN THE WALLS ON THIS TRUMAN SHOW AND LET YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY OCCURRED!!! FOR OVER A MONTH WE WENT BACK AND FORTH ON WETHER OR NOT WE COULD EVEN FIT MY STAGE AT THE FESTIVAL. ONE DAY THEY WOULD SAY YES… WE’D SEND THEM OUR SPECS THEN THEY THEY’D SAY OK… THEN THEY WOULD SEND SPECS BACK THAT DIDN’T FIT THE STAGE. WE WERE OBVIOUSLY DEALING WITH FUCKING IDIOTS WHO DIDN’T REALLY HAVE THE CAPACITY TO REALLY PUT ON THIS SHOW PROPERLY. THEY TRIED 2 GIVE ME A TIME SLOT WERE IT WAS STILL LIGHT OUTSIDE … I HAVE A FUCKING LIGHT SHOW DUMB ASS, IT’S NOT CALLED GLOW IN THE DARK FOR NO REASON SQUID BRAINS! MY PEOPLE WORKED OUT A COMPROMISED STAGE PLOT AND A 3AM TIME SLOT AND I AGREED. FAST FOWARD TO THE DAY OF THE SHOW. MY PRODUCTION MANAGER TRIED TO LOAD IN FOR 24 HOURS BEFORE I WENT ON STAGE BUT THE FESTIVAL WOULDN’T ALLOW US TO DO ANYTHING UNTILL PEARL JAM LEFT THE STAGE. PEARL JAM ENDED ONE HOUR LATE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AT THAT POINT WE’RE RACING AGAINST THE SUN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! AT 4:20AM DON COMES BACK 2 THE BUS AND TELLS ME, ” IT WOULD TAKE 45 MORE MINUTES TO PUT ALL YOUR PYRO IN!” I SAY I HAVE TO GET OUT THERE AS SOON AS POSSIBLE . I HIT THE STAGE AND PEOPLE HAD BEEN THROWING SHIT ON THE STAGE AND HAD ACTUALLY HIT THE JANE SCREEN WITH, I GUESS BOTTLES OR SOMETHING AND HAD BROKEN MY FUCKING SCREEN. REMEMBER WHEN YOU WERE A SHORTY AND WATER WOULD HIT THE TV?????? WHEN I GOT 2 “THROUGH THE WIRE” I STEPPED ON THE FRONT PART OF MY STAGE AND THERE WAS SO MUCH LIQUID ON THE STAGE I COULDN’T MOVE WITHOUT SLIPPING. I HAD TO ADJUST MY WHOLE PERFORMANCE STYLE BECAUSE OF IT. A FEW MORE SONGS IN AND THE SONG WAS ON IT’S WAY UP.. I CUT A FEW SONGS FROM THE SET BECAUSE I WANTED PEOPLE 2 EXPERIENCE STRONGER WHILE THERE WAS STILL SOME DARKNESS TO PERFORM IT IN. I’VE STRUGGLED WITH STRONGER FROM IT’S CONCEPTION. REMEMBER LAST SUMMER WHEN I CANCELED SOME TV APPEARANCES. IT WAS BECAUSE I DIDN’T WANT TO PERFORM STRONGER IN THE DAYTIME. ANYONE WHO CAME TO THE GLOW TOUR CAN UNDERSTAND WHY I WANTED PEOPLE TO SEE IT PROPERLY. IT BROKE MY HEART THAT I COULDN’T GIVE THESE FANS STRONGER IN IT’S GREATEST FORM… BY THE TIME I GOT TO STRONGER IT WAS DAYTIME AND IT BROKE MY HEART. I’M SORRY TO EVERYONE THAT I DIDN’T HAVE THE ABILITY 2 GIVE THE PERFORMANCE I WANTED TO. I’M SORRY… SOMETIMES I GO 2, 3 DAYS W/O SLEEP WORKING ON MY PERFORMANCE… I HAVE TO ICE MY KNEES AFTER EVERY SHOW AND THEY HURT WHEN I WALK THROUGH THE AIRPORT… HAVING AN EXPENSIVE STAGE CUTS MY PAYDAY IN HALF… CALL ME WHAT YOU WANT BUT NEVER SAY I DIDN’T GIVE MY ALL!!!”

________________________________________________________________________________________________

Total cat shit. I feel like I’m reading an angry 12-year old girl’s diary.

The best part of all of this? The crowds were chanting “Kanye Sucks” throughout the rest of the day. It became a rallying cry for all the dirty hippies in attendance. It’s starting to blossom across the nation!! This is the type of turning point in an artist’s career that starts a huge downward spiral. A future episode of Behind the Music will definitely be highlighting this moment. At worst, Kanye is a loud mouthed egomaniac. His “song”, “Stronger”, totally made a disaster out of Daft Punk’s “Harder, Better, Faster, Stronger”. At Kanye’s best, he is a talented side-kick for songs from artists like Madonna or Estelle, where he is allowed to rhyme “more seats” with “floor seats”. Kanye needs to be downsized to be a mere rap accent on pop songs. No more solo acts!!

Here are videos from Bonnaroo where Robert Randolph gets the crowd chanting. I don’t know who Robert Randolph is exactly, but I’m going to download his music ASAP, just because.

An anonymous comment in one of the many posts I ran across simply said, “Kanye hates white people”. Hilarious.

Gay Marriage, blah blah blah

I saw this photo on a friend’s blog, who also found it on another blog. I am hoping, that by posting it on my blog, it’s message will continue to be spread. As Ellen, everyone’s favorite lesbian, said so simply to John McCain, “…blacks and women did not have the right to vote. I mean, women just got the right to vote in 1920. Blacks didn’t have the right to vote until 1870. And it just feels like there is this old way of thinking that we are not all the same. We are all the same people, all of us. You’re no different than I am. Our love is the same.”

Exactly.

I mean, as a gay man, I still don’t get what being a transexual is all about, but have I ever judged them or thought that they were less of a human than myself? Nope. Would I let a transexual get married to whoever they love? Yes. Would I let a transexual make fat jokes about me and talk about my momma? No. I would throw a stale apple fritter at her face and, in turn, they would pull out a ghetto shank and threaten to cut me, so I would call the cops and….*

I digress.

I just truly don’t understand what the big deal is about gay marriage! Let people marry people! I have yet to hear a good argument against gay marriage. I only hear… “because it’s between a man and a woman” or “it ruins the sanctity of marriage” or “because marriage is for pro-creation” or McCain’s response, “We just have a disagreement.” So unapologetically vague.

How is a ceremony that is a symbol of love only between a man and a woman? How is the sanctity of someone else’s marriage being ruined if two ‘mo’s want to celebrate their own idea of sanctity in their own relationship? How is marriage only designed to pop out some babies when there are millions of kids without parents? I think the only answer here is fear – fear to accept that gays are the same as straights in every capacity except for who they are attracted to.

Does it all come down to how gays fit in the religious backdrop of America? I’m not sure. Do we have to go through the old, tired song and dance of “Being gay is a choice!!!!” vs. “You’re just born gay!!!!” Maybe. Until everyone understands that being gay is just the same as being white, being black, being asian, having blue eyes, having freckles, etc. etc. et-mofo-cetera, then our country is at a moral stand still. I am hopeful that the youth of today will help spearhead reform in the direction of acceptance. I might not be a huge fan of religion, but I am a huge fan of love. A friend of mine’s Facebook profile says “Religious Views = Love“. Simple and beautiful.

Being gay is the last thing in America that the general public thinks it is OK to be prejudiced towards. Could America get away with denying these rights to blacks? No. Is it alright to make fun of developmentally disabled people? No. Can we get away with sexually harassing women in the work place? No. Would you point and laugh at a really fat girl? No, but you might think about it. Would you take your stupid, dirty, Hasidic landlord to court? Yes, and I would love every minute of it.

* That story about the tranny actually happened.

Catholic Sex Scandals, Yay!

MOMMY: You are so lucky to have Pope Benedict visit your city.
JEFFREY: I am? The traffic is redonks because of him.
MOMMY: You must be so excited. Are you gonna see him?
JEFFREY: No. Why would I want to see him?
MOMMY: He’s the Pope!
JEFFREY: Please. I have to do laundry.

Last night, I watched ‘Deliver Us From Evil‘, a 2006 documentary which tells the true story of Catholic Priest Oliver O’Grady who sexually abused hundreds of children between the late 70’s and early 90’s. How do we know it’s a true story? Because O’Grady openly admits it and agrees to be interviewed regarding the abuse. He is interviewed in Ireland, where he is comfortably allowed to go about his daily business. Along with several families of O’Grady’s victims, his story is vividly offered to the viewer in great detail. After years of molesting and raping children (and in one instance, a nine-month old baby) and being shuffled around to different parishes by Cardinal Mahony, O’Grady was given financial support by the church and relocated to Ireland where he is free from any punishment. “Safely” tucked away.

ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME?

I’m not going to even get into how wrong it is of O’Grady to do these horrible crimes to children. That’s easy. Everyone can agree on that. The thing that really chaps my cock, is the obvious covering up by Cardinal Mahony and every other piece of shit clergy that new about O’Grady’s behavior. They knew about it, moved him to a different location where no one was told of his previous crimes, and then basically gave permission to a pedophile to continue his awful rampage. Cover it up and walk away. It’s like a fucking Catholic Mafia.

At first, O’Grady was only molesting girls. One piece of cat crap clergy person said, “It’s not as serious as homosexuality, so it was dealt with in a different manner.” Fuck you in your pious mouth! O’Grady soon moved on to include boys in his rapings. No one was safe. One parish after another, he would work his way into the hearts of families and then prey upon their children, one family after another, breaking down the walls of their faith.

Cardinal Mahony, after years of denying he had any knowledge of O’Grady’s actions, was confronted with letters he had written to O’Grady that contradicted his “facts”. After a bunch of hub-bub, Mahony said, “Much like there is privileged doctor and patient conversations and how a husband and wife cannot testify against each other, the relationship between clergy is also a protected conversation.” Yeah, except for when boys and girls are getting RAPED, you fucking CATHOLIC DOUCHEBAG ASSHOLE FUCK FACE! I wonder if creeps like Mahony and Boston’s Cardinal Law understand how their actions not only condone and support criminals, but completely ruins lives and turns people away from their fucked up church.

As if all of this wasn’t enough to steam me, two of the female victims, now in their late thirties, wanted to deliver a letter to our new Pope Benedict XVI. In the letter they have the signatures of hundreds of other victims. These women have become ambassadors for a nation of church goers who have been wronged by leaders of the Catholic Church. So who else better to get answers from? Who else can help them restore their faith? Find some answers? Who else better than to help find a way to get justice against such a terrible crime? Go to the top! Pope Benedict of course.

The women were turned away at the front gates, escorted out by guards, once again, made to feel like they were doing something wrong. Once again, made to be victims. They delivered the letter in the mail. Over a year has passed and there has been no response from the Pope or any other pile of steamy diarrhea from the Vatican. The events surrounding O’Grady are not isolated. There are many men just like O’Grady, being protected by the Catholic Church, even being paid to hide out and keep out of the way. They live cosy, little lives writing letters by a fire, while their victims spend the rest of their lives picking up the shards of their faith, trust, and family.

Are you ready for the real kicker? Sit down for this one…

In 2006, the US authorities had accused Pope Benedict XVI of conspiracy to cover up sexual abuse. At the Vatican’s request, “President” George W. Bush granted the pope immunity from prosecution.

If I had seen this movie before Pope Benedick came to town, I would have been much more excited that he was in NYC. I would not be excited like my mom would have hoped, but I would have been excited to protest his stupid ass. Or at least spit in his general direction. If I were Catholic, I would be writing letters on behalf of these victims. I would add my voice to their cry against this injustice. How can anyone be a part of such a wretched ring of revolting men without speaking up with these victims?

Catholicism is barftastic.

…And Scene

So The Catholic Lady didn’t call me because she got food poisoning from some bad salmon. We met. I gave her all my camp knowledge. She treated me to a bowl of shrimp bisque for dinner. I like her alot. She is a terrific lady. I am thinking of turning straight and becoming a devout Catholic so we can get married. The Douchebags (Spank Humphrey and his wifey-poo) received a nice picture frame and a standing ovation. This will be their last year involved with camp. It will be the first year of a new beginning that includes a team of volunteers. The Catholic Lady said “After this year, the words ‘Spank and Larry’ need not be mentioned because they are in the past”. I couldn’t agree more. So, after this entry I will not dwell on their negativity and hypocrisy any more. I just want to say one more thing – I win….and scene.